Testimony of a Former Drug
Addict
Michael King
I am 22 years old and was born and raised in Monroe,
LA. My parents raised me with a strong Christian
upbringing, in a good home with strong morals and
values. I accepted the Lord and was baptized at age
9. My life was really good as a child. In
5th grade, my dad took his life. A
tremendous void was created. I couldn’t understand
why this would happen. I had never experienced such
a void, such emptiness. All at once my life seemed
confusing and empty.
Two years later, when I was 13 and starting
8th grade, my mom re-married. It was
tough to have a new step-father and try to accept him
into OUR family. At the same time I noticed that the
void I was feeling continued to grow and I didn’t
know how to deal with it. I had been diagnosed ADD. I
began to accidentally believe that's who I
was(identity) instead of just focusing on the
problem, so I never tried my hardest in school out of
fear that if I really couldn't make the grades when I
did put forth my best I would be rejected by the
one's who loved me the most. I really would feel like
a failure. I always felt that I had to be somebody
else or become this person everybody would like in
hopes to fill this void. I turned my hurt and energy
towards athletics. I had always been good at sports
and thought I could escape by involving myself in
this fully. I found that I loved the action,
attention and friendships I was having while involved
in sports. I soon realized that my fulfillment was
too short lived. Sports wasn’t quite the answer. I
still had this void in me and it kept coming back.
Then in 10th grade, I began to rebel.
Beginning with marijuana and eventually harder drugs.
I began partying to fill the void, sneaking out at
night “to party”. As I got older partying continued
and got worse. All the while, trying to find Michael
King and who he was. My mom was so afraid of losing
my brother or me that as my rebellion became more
transparent she became more overprotective, which I
feel now was bad because all I was really trying to
do is become independent and prove to myself and my
family that I could make it and be somebody. Also as
I look back I see now that all the Christian
upbringing I had was just head knowledge, and I had
learned how to "be a Christian", but never had
a genuine heart to heart relationship with
Jesus Christ. Also I based myself as a Christian on
my experience I had at age 9 when I was baptized. But
as time progressed my relationship with God
was lost. I was never able to decide or discover who
I was or what I could achieve. I became so
frustrated with the way my life was going.
In August of 1998, after I graduated high
school I somehow got into college. With a brand new
start and a baseball career as incentive I moved away
to go to school. I thought that by getting away from
my parents, drugs, and “friends”, I could get a fresh
start and do it my way. Well things got
progressively worse. The more I rebelled, the more
my mom kept trying to influence me. She was always
telling me what I should do and how I should do it.
My rebellion was in full swing at this point. All
this while I kept trying to figure out who Michael
King was. Still the tremendous void and hurt was in
my heart. Depression set in and soon followed
run-ins with the law. Arrests for “possession”,
D.W.I.’s , school failures, my baseball career
ending, having trouble holding jobs, all this was
happening around the same time - my life was
unraveling! I was, also, diagnosed with bi-polar
disorder which added to my frustrations. Again,
trying to fill this constant void, which by now was
only getting bigger. Drugs, alcohol, women, none of
them could fill this emptiness. I was really
frustrated and had pretty much given up with very
little or no hope in my life. All the while, my
mother kept on me about my need to turn to the Lord,
and away from the friends and lifestyle I had chosen.
My mom meant well in the love she was showing me, but
it was a love that drove her to be overprotective
because of the loss of my dad. As I continued to try
and pull apart in rebellion it really did hurt me to
see me hurting my mother. But at this point the
people and influence I had surrounded myself with I
felt that this was the only way I could go to find
out who I was without my parents trying to do it for
me this time.
About a year and a half ago, I came to the
realization that “my” way wasn’t working. After
crying out to Jesus, I became aware of the Teen
Challenge program in Southern California. In October
of 2000, in Shafter Teen Challenge, I was broken and
gave it all to God. My heart began to soften and I
decided to rededicate my life and give everything to
Him. It was here that I discovered who Michael King
was created to be -a child of God! I began to put
all that head knowledge of God into my heart and
began to grow and mature as a Christian and most of
all, a personal; intimate, genuine
relationship with God through my Lord and
Saviour Jesus Christ. I felt a transformation take
place, the void I had been searching to fill was
closing, as I surrendered more of me and drew closer
to Him and His will for my life. The Lord has many
things in my life spiritually, mentally, and
physically. He's restored a friendship between my mom
and I, have a great relationship with my stepdad. My
Lord continues to prove Himself to me more and more
through His faithfulness, LOVE and unconditional
acceptance. Words truly can't describe what He's done
in my heart.
I'm preparing for a return to College now
to minor in history and major in physical ed. I am
now confident in who I am and where the Lord is
guiding and directing my life. AMAZING GRACE !
In His Grip,
Michael King